For parents: how to help without taking it over
By Ryan Jaffe ·
Parents are the reason most of this work happens, and they are also the fastest way to flatten an essay. Both things are true, and neither is anyone’s fault. You know your kid, so you know which stories make them look good, and that instinct pulls the writing toward a highlight reel.
What actually helps: remembering the details they have forgotten. What they were like at seven. The thing they did all summer that nobody in the family thought was notable. You have information your student does not.
What does not help: rewriting sentences. An adult voice in a seventeen-year-old essay is obvious to a reader in a paragraph, and it costs more credibility than any improvement it buys.
When I work with a family, I tell the parent the plan, the timeline and what is realistic. The drafts stay between me and the student. That is the arrangement that keeps the notes honest.